Meditation to me is a beautiful idea of something I’d love to do, kind of like yoga, but can’t seem to adopt permanently into my life. I set intentions to do it. I get up early and sit on the sofa waiting. I save problems and bring them “to my meditation”. But any sort of routine I’ve started has never lasted for any serious length of time. I’ve even tried guided meditation, but that hardly feels like meditation to me. Doesn’t meditation involve emptying your mind? That’s my problem.
I can’t do that.
I wonder if meditation is easier for introverts. I’m an extrovert, which means I more often seek out the company of others than solitude. I like being around people, talking, sharing, dissecting life and its adventures. Like we do here. If I were a person who found more joy in being alone, I’d be halfway there in this meditation business. Because when I attempt to meditate, alone is how I feel.
I’ve heard wonderful things about meditation. But it feels like a club to which I am denied admittance. Maybe I haven’t tried hard enough yet. Or maybe I wouldn’t enjoy the music “in there” anyway. Maybe if meditation were like dancing, I’d catch on more readily. (Is there a dance form of meditation?)
When I do my crafts; knitting, crocheting, stitching, it’s like a meditation. When I’m sitting on the wharf at our summer place in Cape Breton gazing into the water, that’s like a meditation. Sometimes I slip out the back door into our yard and stand staring at the brook running through our property. That’s like a meditation. All these activities feel wonderful but I’m never completely silent during these times. My thoughts never cease their relentless chatter.
How do you feel about meditation? Have you established a regular routine? How did you manage to do it? Do you believe meditation is a practice for everyone?
photo credit: HaPe Gera
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Meditation is not so hard. A lot of people get into a meditative state when they connect with nature, get enveloped by that feeling of oneness with the fabric of creation. Medittion is just going deeper and deeper into the silence of that experience.Unfortunately there are so many techniques and religious teachings that want to make meditation into some big ritual that you have to do in the 'right' way. I myself went to stay in Buddhist monasteries and read so many books that took me right away from the experience that I had already started to come into contact with in my early twenties. Fortunately after a lot of messing around with all sorts misleading ideas I came into contact with the Sahaja Yoga group and they showed me how to get into state they called 'thoughtless awareness' and after a couple of weeks I started getting back to those states of oneness and bliss- except more profoundly than before.
What I realized is that it's a totally natural thing that is innately part of you- it's not some extra thing that you learn from outside or go and purchase... I feel like that with a lot of meditation techniques, it's like an extra thing, almost like an app for a phone- something that you try to add on to your life or personality but it gives people the wrong idea completely and they miss out on the catching the part of themselves that is the real opening into meditative states.
The Sahaja techniques I use you cn learn for free, there's online tutorials at freemeditation.com but IMO it's better to go to a class and learn from a real person who can adapt to you, answer your questions and all that. The classes are all free too. The website has links to them.
And the part where you say that your thoughts never completely stop, it's because the attention and the thoughts are still the same thing basically. What you can learn is to let the attention seperate from the thoughts, once that happens you see that the thoughts are not 'you' and then you can just allow them to stop. But that's the secret isn't it. How do you do that? It's actually quite a straightforward process that I think pretty much anyone can do.... but it's a bit hard to describe it all in a blog comment. But seriously, look up those classes. There are people who know how to do it and how to show others so they can do it themselves.
@SteveMcLearie Hi Steve! Welcome to Life, for instance! Thanks for your detailed explanation and for that wonderful link!
You stayed in a Buddhist monastery?! Wow - that had to be an interesting experience! I like "thoughtless awareness" and the way you explain separating the attention from the thoughts. Somehow that makes sense to me. We'll see how it goes tomorrow! Meanwhile, I want to spend some time at that link today!
Question: I get that feeling when I connect with nature, but do you notice that you can't "do" that by looking at a photograph or even by looking out a window? The experience is completely different when you step outside and breathe in the fresh air. Do you know what I mean?
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@Lori@SteveMcLearie Well, the Buddhist stuff was interesting in a cultural tourist kind of way, I guess the same way a Tibetan would find a Catholic environment interesting. Ultimately I found it was pretty much a dead end for me as far as meditation goes.... people were more interested in all the normal things that go on with organized religion, probably no need to go into all that here.
Yes, I know what you mean about nature. The other interesting thing is that while photos cant communicate it, often paintings can. Although I suppose it's not so much that they're communicating nature as the nature that's within the painter. Probably that's what photos lack- that intensive engagement with a living process, although they can still be very beautiful.
How did you go with the meditation?
@SteveMcLearie I see what you mean about a photograph as opposed to a painting. Interesting.
I'm still working on the meditation in the morning. I'll keep at it :-)
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Hi Lori,
How are you doing?
I have a little idea about the meditation. There is a good book by BKS Iyengar ( yoga guru) about yoga. There he clearly says, meditation without yoga is a recipe for disaster. India has been known as the land where meditation is a way of life. However a lot of people think meditation is sitting and concentrating , which it is but not all. A person who is meditating needs strong back muscles and body. Yoga can help build such a body. Then it is about concentrating and trying to reach the core.
I have not put a lot of effort into it but maybe the book may help.
http://www.amazon.com/Light-Yoga-B-K-Iyengar/dp/0805210318
@blogaks Hi Ashvini! Thanks for the recommendation for the book! I'll check it out. What you say makes sense. It does take strong back muscles to sit and concentrate for any amount of time. When you talk about reaching the core you make me think of a book I have: http://www.amazon.com/Quantum-Touch-Core-Transformation-Alter-Reality/dp/1556437811 The breathing the book teaches is powerful. Hmm... maybe I need to combine this with my meditation practice.
Do you do yoga? Meditate daily? :-)
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Hi Lori,
Have you thought about going on a meditation retreat. This can be a good way to get into meditating for an extended period of time, which can be used as motivator for meditating when you get home.
I found the comment you made about people who are more introverted being more suited to meditation. In Hinduism for instance, there a number of ways to reach liberation. Meditative practices in general are more appealing to those who are more 'inwards' in their nature.
@Hiten Vyas Hi Hiten! I'd love to go on a meditation retreat and I agree, it would be a great way to learn. Thanks for backing me up when I say it might be easier for me to learn to meditate if I were more introverted! Do you meditate on a daily basis? How did you learn?
Welcome to Life, for instance Hiten!
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@Lori Thanks Lori! Yes, I meditate on a daily basis. 45 minutes in the morning and 45 minutes at night. I practice Vipassana. I started around 4 years ago and was taught by a couple of Buddhist monks, who live at the local Buddhist temple. I'm really glad to have found your blog Lori.
@Hiten Vyas Wow Hiten! That's discipline! I bet it was life-changing for you to start doing this!
I'm glad this blog found you!
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I WANT to meditate...but like you Lori, I can't seem to do it 'right'.
However, we (again) are much alike. I enjoy the 'peaceful' part of nature, the babbling brook, the call of the eagles....but you're right - my mind is never 'quiet', never 'still'.I've tried the guided meditation, and it does work better...but then i'm still focused on listening to someone else. and like you - I am an extrovert, and I enjoy other people's company...I'm not a big one for solo trips in to the woods for extreme lengths of time...a little bit of alone time, here and there...and I'm good :)
BUT I also believe that the form of meditation can be different for everyone...maybe we ARE meditating in our own way when we are watching that babbling brook...I mean what is the goal after all of meditation... relaxing, peace...the brook provides me that!
@StaceyMJCouturier Thanks for backing me up in this ;-) I am forging ahead, despite my difficulties. I think I'd like to have a meditation practice, or at least the ability to do it so I'm sticking to it until I do! Perhaps some of will involve stilling myself long enough to sit and stare at the brook. I'm usually jumping up to go somewhere and do something after only being there for a moment. I'm gonna work on that ;-)
According to the information here in the comments, there are many ways to come into the present moment -it all counts! :-)
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I actually slept the first time I meditated!
But I meditate while I pray. Our thoughts are concentrated! Meditation means clearing off your mind, but doing it completely seems to be almost impossible for me!
@Hajra I've done that too Hajra, when I try to do it in bed! They say you need to be sitting up in a chair - I guess that's why! There's plenty of great ideas here in the comments. I've committed to adding meditation to my morning routine and these comments are helping with that! Are you interested in starting a meditation routine?
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Lori, I'm with you. For me, I find I'm too easily distracted. This sounds like a copout, I know, but something you said struck me. You said "maybe I'm not trying hard enough." I think the whole point of meditation is that you're FREE from your thoughts, free from distractions. And that brings me to another question: is it possible that we meditate on things without even realizing we're meditating. Does meditating have to be an official "quiet time" thing where we sit on a rug or hold our head in a Bible or other sacred book? COuld it be that those thoughts we drift off to during the day that make us feel good about life are a form of meditation?
Curious as to your thoughts.
@Bryan Thompson Hi Bryan! When I said maybe I wasn't trying hard enough, I mean that maybe I wasn't giving it enough time for the practice of meditation to set in for me. In the comments here people say it took 2-4 weeks for the sitting and breathing to make sense and become something else. No matter - this year I'm DOING it! ;-)
I think those drift-off times are also a time of meditation. I think you're talking about day dreams! They [brilliant people commenting here] say anything that brings your focus into the now is valid. I learned so much from the comments here that my determination to make this a part of my life every day is restored. And, yes, I think feeling good is very important. I suppose it depends on what your goals for meditation are: recharging and relaxing, connecting with the oneness, sinking into the now, finding solutions? My intentions include all of these! What are your intentions?
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You already have lots of good responses here, but I'll add mine to the brew. I do meditate now on a regular basis, but if by meditate you mean I sit there with an empty mind in perfect bliss and harmony, that's not me! Our minds think--that's what they do. My mind is never empty! Meditation for me is a gentle returning to the present, not getting caught up in my mind's hamster wheel activities, not getting "hooked" into the story.
As for my routine, it's pretty simple. I meditate for a few minutes every morning after I get up, pee, feed the dog, and have some juice. The length of time depends on what's happening--anywhere from 5-20 minutes. The point for me is the consistency rather than the length of time. If I have to find an hour every morning, it's not going to happen.
Periodically, I meditate in a group. There, it's easier to meditate for more extended periods.
Also, like you, I find that some activities can be like mediation. I practice martial arts. I find that my focus on my body and the movements brings me out of my inner chatter and into the present. I'm not a runner, but I've heard runner express this same concept.
Really, we all have to do what works for us. And in our own time. I wanted to meditate for years before I actually started doing it.
@galenpearl I like your method of not holding yourself to an hour-long routine. You practice martial arts! Which ones? I'd love to find the time (and space) to do Tai Chi sometime in my life! Not sure if that is considered a martial art. But I digress.
I've never meditated with a group. I bet it would be interesting. I think the key is in your last statement - just start!
So which martial arts do you do? :-)
@Lori I got my black belt in taekwondo in November. I also practice tai chi, which is indeed a martial art. As for sitting on a cushion type meditation, I got more settled in my practice by going through Shambhala training last year. Shambhala is rooted in Tibetan Buddhism but is a secular practice. You can google Shambhala if you want to know more. I also was part of a contemplative prayer group (another form of meditation) at my church for several years. But yes, just starting is the key! I found that I spent much more time reading about it than doing it, and finally figured out I had that backwards!!!
@galenpearl You do Tai Chi. I was doing a health show years ago and there were demonstrations and explanations. Plus my sister and sister-in-law do Tai Chi. One of these days... And you're a black belt in taekwondo?! That must keep you very active. I'm impressed and inspired. But I'll start with the meditation ;-)
@galenpearl Really great points!
I agree that meditation can take many shapes and forms - Lori, it sounds like you already "do" it when you lose yourself in an activity and are so engaged your brainwaves are slowing down. There are many forms of meditation - not all are for everyone - but I do think that some form of "being present" can be beneficial to all!
@Sabrina at MyMiBoSo@galenpearl Hi Sabarina. Is slowing down the brainwaves the goal or method to meditation? We're all talking about being present here on this post. That seems to be the key factor. Do you have a regular practice of meditation? How do you do it?
@Sabrina at MyMiBoSo@galenpearl I'll check it out . Seems I have a sample of it around here somewhere! Thanks!
@Lori@galenpearl Yes I believe that is one form of it - I have tried their first mp3 which is called "Dive" but there are other forms out there as well if you don't click with that one.
@Sabrina at MyMiBoSo@galenpearl Binaural beats. Is that like holosynch?
@Lori@galenpearl Actually I too have struggled like you Lori to create a regular practice, but I find when I schedule it in and have my phone pop up a reminder it's more likely to happen.
I shoot for 4 times per week, and I've played with various forms. I've had the most success listening to binaural beats while meditating - try it and see if it works for you!
It's funny because when I read your post I was thinking the exact oposite about why I find it hard to meditate. I was thinking it's because I'm an introvert. I know how to spend time alone already and don't really find that time lonely so my mind is always wandering and occupying itself when I'm alone. Very interesting thoughts below about how to meditate! I will have to read through them later today! =)
@MelanieAThomp Ah, you can't use the same excuse! LOL Yes, there is a lot of great information here in the comments! It's changing the way I see my meditation practice shaping up! Let us know what you conclude after reading it all!
Lori,
OK, this is one I actually know something about! Yes, you CAN meditate. Why would you want to? Well...because when you finally get to the place that is calm, you see everything.
All that intuitive stuff that you want to access. Meeting your spiritual team (like guardian angels and spirit guides) - yup, they're right there with you, and you can communicate with them. This leads to going beyond what you know right now and digging into you - what you can do, your path opened up wide.
So how do you do it? Start by not trying to shut your mind up. You don't have to sit still, you can start off by doing it while exercising in some way. Go for a walk and let your mind spill out everything that wants to come out. Then, you'll notice a space open up. It's quiet in there. Even if just for a few seconds. After that, when thoughts come up, imagine sending them away in a thought bubble floating away from you up to the sky. Keep sending them away. When you're tired, go home and forget about it, just resume your normal routine.
Do this for a while, and see how suddenly those spaces open up more and more often. That's where your intuition pops in. In the quiet. That's where you start.
@Julie | A Clear Sign Hi Julie! This is a great explanation - thanks! So well written too! I"ll try the thought bubble idea - it sounds interesting! I like the idea of finding the quiet. I find this morning, after reading all these wonderful explanations of meditation, I'm inspired and having a quieter day! ;-)
Do you have a daily practice of meditation? Or do you do it as you feel you need/want to?
@Lori I do a variety of meditations, very few of them sitting completely still. I guess I would say I "check in" every day but more formal meditation is done on days when I do readings for other people. In that case, you really do have to do it.
@Lori Oh, see - you were already doing it lol! I didn't know you did Reiki.
I do intuitive readings for businesses, individuals and relationships, plus intuitive development training (www.julielangdonbarrett.com).
@Julie | A Clear Sign I guess I do meditate at times then! When I do Reiki I'm in a whole other state! That seems easier somehow!
What kind of readings do you do?
You Mentioned dancing !
The Sufi Muslim Whirling Dervishes of Istanbul form of meditation.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L_Cf-ZxDfZA
@johncharlesowens Well that was amazing! How do they do it for so long and not get dizzy!? I've heard the words, "whirling dervishes" before but I never knew what they were.
I neglected to ask you John if you meditate.
@Lori I do meditate.
I have been waiting and listening in silence to God now 26 years . Claudia mentioned The Monk who was meditating while being interviewed . That is what I do . The way I explain it is, can you worry and do the dishes then you can meditate and do the dishes . The part of the brain you are using to worry is the same part you will be using to meditate. Jesus said repent which means change directions swap out worry (fear)for the prayer of quiet (peace).
@johncharlesowens
I like that John - better to meditate when doing the dishes than worry! We don't think of meditating in this way. Here's to swapping peace for fear. Why not! :-)
Hi Lori
As it would happen I spent my day listening to a 3 hour teaching on christian meditation while traveling by car to northern Alberta.
Obviously the first thing to get clear is, you are focusing your attention in meditation. What are you going to focus your attention on ?
"Contemplation is essentially a listening in silence, an expectancy..." — Thomas Merton
"Nothing is more like God than Silence." — Meister Eckhart
"Silence is God's first language." — St. John of the Cross
"When life is heavy and hard to take, go off by yourself. Enter the silence. Bow in prayer. Don't ask questions: Wait for hope to appear." — Lamentations 3:28-29 (MSG)
"Be still, and know that I am God!" — Psalm 46:10 (NLT)
Jesus said "But you, when you pray, go into your inner room, close your door and pray to your Father who is in secret, and your Father who sees what is done in secret will reward you. Matthew 6:6
Could anything be more secretive then Silence. The only thing that all major religions can agree upon is that silence is the surest path to enlightenment.
Is their any thought that you can think to produce silence? I would bet that you are trying to produce silence. Silence can not be produced it can only be experienced it already exist you just have not been paying attention to it.
Lets take a closer look at silence . Silence exist between thoughts already we just want to expand it to say 20 minutes twice a day. Once in the morning and once at night. Now how are we going to do that. By practicing twice a day ,your brain will get the hint and start to comply. As I mentioned earlier meditation is a focusing of your attention. Some people start with a “word”, or an image, this is just a tool to get started a way of bringing you back to the silence like a reminder. Thoughts will appear what you want to do is, learn to just let them go. The “word” is just a tool to brake an attachment that has formed with a thought to remind you of your intention. What is your intention with regards to silence. Can God be experienced in the silence. Or is it just going to be silence. As a christian I believe that if you listen to and wait upon silence you will eventually be able to experience God among other benefits. Just relax and know that silence is natural, you have just trained your brain to work a different way up until now. You should know that you will be exposing yourself to the shadow side of your false self ,so it could be rough for a while until this hidden stuff is released from your subconscious. Remember just let the thoughts go, you will be free eventually.
@johncharlesowens Hi John! Thanks for taking the time to explain Christian meditation so well. Isn't it funny that you were listening to tapes on it yesterday!
So it's all about silence then. Somehow, the idea that I'm reaching for silence rather than fighting off my endless thoughts sounds easier! I also resonate with the idea that the brain will get the idea in time that "we're doing silence now" to put it roughly! I think I will try a word for focus. That makes sense to me too.
Today was Day 2 of my efforts to establish a morning practice of meditation and it went alright. I'll "get" this eventually.
I'm off to breakfast and then I'll check out the video! A dancing meditation!?!? I'm intrigued! :-)
@Lori Hi Lori
It is more of a relaxing then a reaching. The first thing to learn is to let your thoughts go as gently as you can this letting go is key. It is sort of like soothing a little kid that has skinned his knee. He is all upset and he is trying to tell you all about it and you are gently trying to get him to let go and relax, that he is safe and it is going to be ok.
Meditation isn't just something you have to do sitting in a quite room. There is mindful meditation, or walking meditation...Sounds like you do that when you craft. Clearing your mind, allowing some peace. It gives space to allow for something else to slip inside...like a good idea, or forgivness.
Just allowing your thoughts to quiet...that's all you need. Awake or resting...
@dshort2010 Hi Dawn! I like the sound of this! I've heard of walking meditations. Quieting my mind is the hardest part - it's so busy and noisy in there :o What kind of meditation do you do?
@Lori I take advantage of quiet moments...I too have trouble quieting my mind but I just let the thoughts flow until they quiet themselves. Ussally I need to give those thoughts attention.
I haven't spent any time learning how to meditate but I have long 'assumed' that I know how to do it. When I want to I can shut off the external noise and focus on just being. Don't know how to describe it any other way than that.
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@thejackb Hey Jack! I envy you that! It's what I'm working on. Seems I'm been putting too much emphasis on shutting off the external noise and not enough on focusing on just being. It's always easier to focus on a positive too. Thanks for that!
Are you able to cat nap to? Shutting off the mind is a big part of both napping and meditating (and getting to sleep at night quickly).
@Lori Yep, I fall asleep in seconds.
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@TheJackB Okay, rub it in then! :-) But hey! Today it only took me 55 minutes to have a 15 minute cat nap. So I'll get there!
Like you, I feel that I should be meditating, but I don't do it nearly enough. For me, it is a lot like how I used to view stretching. It feels soooooo good, but I hardly ever used to do it. Finally something clicked, and now I stretch at least once a day, normally twice. I love the feel during and after.
For a woman who is so easily distracted by bright shiny things, it is hard to settle my mind to meditate. I have a routine that can get me to focus, and I remain more focused for hours afterwards. I'm just waiting for the click with meditation.
@TammyL Hi Tammy! I want to borrow your colorful description of yourself and add it to my excuse for not having a daily meditation practice - yet. "For a woman who is so easily distracted by bright shiny things, it is hard to settle my mind to meditate." I love that! I too have a morning routine now. It was one of my intentions for 2012 - to establish a morning routine. I have all kinds of things in it and want to add meditation to complete it! Let's just DO this! :-)
I'm an extrovert too and meditation, or as I like to call it, silence, is what recharges me! When I think of it as silence I can be with it more consistently and it nourishes me. When I use the word meditation it becomes more like something to do and do "right" in order to get the benefits.
@Sandi Amorim Hi Sandi! I like the idea of calling it silence! Just thinking of it that way can have the recharging aspect as its intention. Hmm... I'm going to try that tomorrow - I find the name you give a thing has such importance!
I really enjoyed your book! Just went looking at your blog for it (couldn't find it there :-( ) Would you like to put the link to it here? I read it as I was thinking about publishing this post! I think it would fit here very well!
@Lori Hey Lori, I'm not sure which book you're talking about!
@Sandi Amorim oooh, sorry, I got you confused with someone else. NOW it makes sense what you said, which contradicted something I read in the book! So sorry about that Sandi! :o