Today we welcome Jane to the porch to tell her blogging story! Jane is a published author! She writes about our favourite topic: life! Jane blogs regularly over here! Take it away Jane!
We’re drawn to what we feel scared of. I think what I fear most is being lonely. So I’ve chosen a job where I spend several hours each day by myself. I sit alone in front of the computer, and I write.
Writing is a lonely profession. If you can’t deal with that, you’ll never make it as an author. You must force yourself to work when no-one is watching. You must suffer the slings and arrows of outrageous comments, and afterwards must you sit down and write some more. I work alone but I bare my heart through my blog posts. When I press ‘Publish’, that private confessional becomes totally exposed. Sometimes I feel like Lady Godiva as I walk along the street.
Loneliness is a good thing for writers. That ache makes you work to reconnect with the world. Art is a form of communication. Feel the need to reach out and touch someone. Put your thoughts and emotions into words. This is how I feel, as I run down the road on this wintry day, with the wind in my hair, wearing my old blue coat.
Ironically, blogging can make you feel more isolated. I’ve actually got lots of nice friends who supportively subscribe to my blog. That way, they feel they are keeping up with what I’m doing. Consequently they don’t need to call and meet for coffee. But I have no idea what’s going on in their lives. Luckily I trained as an anthropologist, so I’m a good listener. When we do get together, I’m thirsty as a sponge for new ideas.
Writers are by nature liminal beings. That’s an anthropological term: it means borderline, subversive, potentially threatening. We are outsiders, doomed to stand slightly apart from the rest of the world. Writers stand on the edge of society and hold a mirror up to reality. We’re in and out, up and down, hot and cold, black and white. No wonder people sometimes react strongly to our judgments.
But that’s a part I choose to play. I teach mythology, so I’m aware of archetypal roles in our lives. When I write, I’m a wise woman: my personal paranoias become grist to the mill of my composition.
We are all constantly creating our own life scripts. Writing is one way of expressing your thoughts and dreams. It lets you convey an image that you identify with. In real life, there are other ways of being the person you want to become.
Do you ever feel exposed after baring your soul on your blog? Do you sometimes feel like an outsider? Is your blog representing your true persona or the persona of someone you want to be?
See other posts in the Life of a Blogger series here! We would love to hear your blogging story! Email me and I’ll send you the Guidelines for submitting your contribution.
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Hello Jane
Thank you for your article.
First let me say.... I am a newbie, not a pioneer when it comes to blogging. But I feel that I have much to offer to my readers (not many at this time).
I love to relate to others because when it comes to the real nitty gritty, we are all the same. We go through highs and lows, but we still come out on top.
I am going to start sharing about my life as a child and the experience of bullying which affected me for a long time. But I have resolve and my life today is wonderful and I am at peace.
Transparency is the key in gaining relationships on the internet, simply because some of us will never meet in person, but we can learn to care and support each other.
Thank you again and all the comments are great.
Gladys
@Gladys Cruz Hi Gladys~ Sorry to be so late in getting over here to welcome you to Life, for instance! Your blogging story sounds interesting! Maybe you'd like to submit a post to this series?!?! Come through the link at the bottom of the post or contact me through this site! :-)
Latest blog post: How are You Doing with Your Resolutions for 2013?
Anthropologist, huh? So what did you find out;; have we changed much or are we still basically the same at our core?
Great post; you are 'exposed' to a certain degree when you put yourself out there as a writer. For many, blogging has allowed them a semi-anonymous was to express themselves; whereas they would have never been comfortable doing it otherwise.
Thanks for sharing.
@bdorman264 Thanks, Bill! One thing that I've learned from anthropology is that all people have a lot in common. For me, the most important human characteristic is that we like to tell tales.
'Human beings are the only creatures who tell stories.... Animals communicate in sound-bites of experience: the honey-bee's waggle; the dog's barked warning (but) only people tell stories to make sense of their lives. It is telling stories that makes us fully human.' ('LifeWorks', p.11)
Whether it's writing a book or composing a life script, we are all constantly weaving stories.
I agree that Writers always stand out. They are more in line with reality than any others.
When I share my personal stories on my blog, I do that hoping to be connected with more like-minded people and I have been successful and my readers also help me learn a lot because I'm just 20 and most of my readers are in the 'judge' stage of their lives.
Thanks for sharing your story!
Aditya
@adityasam Hi Aditya! You seem to be doing what the experts suggest - sharing personal stories. Do you find you attract many in your age group or people of all ages? Part of what I enjoy so much about blogging is the agelessness of the people I meet. It crosses age boundaries that in real life are more difficult to cross.
What do you mean by the "judge" stage?
@adityasam We all learn from each other, don't you think? The people towards whom we are drawn often have the most to teach us. Thanks for sharing your comments!
When I first started blogging four years ago I did feel a bit exposed. I guess I've gotten used to it, as I don't feel that way as much anymore. My blogging persona mostly matches who I am. It's not a complete me, but it's the portion of me that focuses personal development. I hope that if someone were to meet me in real life after reading my blog they would feel like the real life me matches the blogger me.
@ericwest Hi Eric! Welcome to Life, for instance!
You've been blogging for four years - wow! Did you find your blog changed over that time? As we evolve, our blogs seem to evolve too, but maybe that's not the case with a personal development blog? How do you see it?
@ericwest It's crucially important to be true to yourself, in writing and in life! But we also grow and develop as human beings: maybe through our writing we can experiment with these changes... What do you think?
Hi Jane,
Thanks for offering your story to this series! I can appreciate that writing is a lonely career but blogging changes that, doesn't it? Maybe it's just me because being disciplined ("You must force yourself to work when no-one is watching. ") was something I was used to because I've been self-employed forever. So for me, coming into blogging was like going to a party!
I do feel exposed after baring my soul here. But after nearly 28 months at it, I know that if I don't represent who I AM, I'm just hurting myself.
You didn't mention how long you've been blogging. Did you start before you wrote your book? Does the blog help to sell the book? I love how the link on your site says "BookS" - are you working on another one?
@Lori Hi Lori, I've been blogging for about fifteen months now. My book 'LifeWorks' came out last year, and I wrote about the launch on my blog. Before that, the 'Books' section on my website was ones I'd enjoyed reading and wanted to recommend! I hope that the blog gives readers a taste of my writing style, and it's great to connect with new people here. But in truth I write for friends, both old and online. When I write a post on something interesting, it's my equivalent of making jam - I hope that my friends will see it as a small gift. J;)
@Jane Bailey Bain "Making jam" - cool way to look at it! what an amazing opportunity blogging offers us! :-)
Hi Jane, I cherish my alone time and all the peace and quiet. It's like a gift. There are times when I want to socialize and say hello to the world, but they are pretty rare - maybe once or twice a week is PLENTY in my book! I do miss my "real life" friends, who are scattered all over the country - none near me. If I wanted to see them for lunch or coffee, I'd have to get on an airplane.
To answer the questions, certainly if we are being honest and are writing about our lives, to the extent we allow it we are baring our souls. I love to read people's stories - I find that's what connects us all. As much of an "outsider" as one might feel, there are plenty of other people who know exactly what we mean and can relate to us...and we easily find them through the internet. We are never truly alone, we are all connected. My blog is all me, 100%, for better or worse!
@Julie | A Clear Sign Aw, it's for BETTER Julie! That's why we go over to your place - speaking for myself at least - I ENJOY going over there!
Do you find it's hard to bare your soul the way you do? Your topic is a little more away from the mainstream than most bloggers.
@Lori You may have noticed that there are a lot of blog posts lately that are mainly about family or daily incidents, and much less to do with spirituality and intuition, per se (although I always weave that in, just because that's how I figure out what I am doing!!) Most of what I write is just what comes to me in a moment of inspiration, some being more powerful than others. I work out what's happening with me through the process of the writing - usually! Sometimes! Since I've been at this for about 2 years now, it's changed a lot and I suspect it's going to change a lot more as I attempt to follow where I am being led. So no, it's not hard, it's fun!
@Julie | A Clear Sign I get that Julie - " that's how I figure out what I am doing!!" it's becoming that for me too! Blogs, like lives, evolve too, don't they! :-)
@Julie | A Clear Sign How true! I quite agree that time alone is so important for creativity. To quote from my blog post on 'New Year Resolutions': "I really need to start writing again... I'm going to mark 'white space' in my diary for two mornings a week and just sit in front of my computer until something comes." It's the only way to do it! ;)
@Jane Bailey Bain Right, you've got to do what works! I will head over and check out your blog, sounds very interesting...
@Julie | A Clear Sign Thank you, Julie! I've actually just posted a new piece about Labyrinths, hope you enjoy it....
Nice to meet you Jane, and surely a nice series Lori!
Yes indeed, I couldn't agree more with the isolation and lonely life writers lead, being one myself. I guess with Bloggers too it's the same, though comments or social media they get an outlet or way to convey their feelings. :)Speaking of myself too, I think blogging is one sure way of expressing what I feel, and that doesn't make me lonely any longer. What I write is what I feel and it's almost like I am speaking to my readers, and I get their instant reactions through the comments at my blog. However, when I write for my clients, that's surely does get lonely and one does feel isolated and often bored too, if the topic isn't much of an interest to you. Nevertheless, I am glad we are all part of the Blogosphere and have each other to share our feelings with - isn't it?Thanks for sharing more of you with us. :)
@Harleena Singh So true Harleena!
It's like a measuring tool to know if you are writing from the heart - if you are bored, you're writing for the wrong reasons. And it's nice to have the feedback. When I write a new post I'm excited and anxious to put it out there to see what people will have to say about it!
@Harleena Singh I agree! It's wonderful when we connect with people online who we would probably never have met in everyday life. I have someone in Scotland who has really helped me with timely comments and support: we've never actually met but we probably will one day, and I count her as a real friend. Also I'm grateful to Lori for providing the forum for us all to connect here! Thanks for sharing your thoughts. ;)