My mother died seven years ago on the day of the US Thanksgiving. We live in Canada but Mom was American. Her family was just sitting down to Thanksgiving dinner when they received our sad phone call.

When she was in the hospital in those last few months I had a rare visit alone with her. I asked her the question I’d long wanted to ask; if she had a chance to return for another life, would she choose to return?

I believed I already knew her answer because she had been sick for many years.  “No!” she replied immediately.  Of course, I thought, she had suffered so much in this life; why would she risk another? But though I was right about her response I was wrong about her reason.

My mother was always exceedingly grateful for everything in her life. It wasn’t that she was afraid to chance a life that contained illness, but that she couldn’t imagine a life that could measure up to the wonderful life she had this time.

I have often pondered this question. I know I would have said “yes” without hesitation before Alex died. Now I’m not so sure. I’d like to assume our answer changes based on the level of pain we experience in this life yet my mother endured a lot of pain.

It makes me think of the question; Is it better to have loved and lost than to never have loved at all? I know my answer to this question. Would I have chosen not to have a son had I known I’d lose him when he was just twenty-three years old? No, I’d choose him every time!

The question remains; if you had the chance to return for another life, would you jump at the chance? Would you hesitate? Would you decline?

We always say, “You only get one life…”  but what if that’s not true? What if you could come back and live a whole other life? Would you?

photo credit: Tony Fischer